Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Diaper Bag

The header may have thrown you off. What, you may ask, is the shotgun obsessed degenerate dice player on about now. What I am on about is this wonderful diaper bag I saw on EBAY. Why did no one buy me this in 1995 when I had 2 kids in diapers and another one the way shortly? I was constantly bemoaning my plight as I went afield with the wife and babies with some hideous pink and blue shoulder bag contraption strapped to my person....the bag, one of several in the wife's line up,festooned with duckies or lambs or some such crap.  Said bag was bulging with infant poop supplies and sippy cups and related gear. I longed for a more masculine diaper bag. I had dreams of designing and marketing such a bag. I never got around to it. When you have infants ages a few days, 2 years and 4 years, and a partnership in a law firm in the offing...you find it hard to set aside time to design, produce,  market and distribute anything. If I had realized that vision...the result would have been nearly identical to this rig. I would have offered it in the shown fatigue green as well as wetlands camo. Any man would be fine with hoisting this diaper bag on the hated Target or Superfresh excursion if the bag looked like this. Every man dreads being caught with the pink and blue diaper bag over the shoulder when you are near the dairy section and the wife and babies are over near the bread aisle. Without infants to legitimize your bag...people look at you like you may be some kind of  Fire Island beach queen.

My kids are now all well past the age where they can administer and regiment their own defecation. So I have no need for a diaper bag anymore. Nevertheless, this one was so cool, and represented the manifestation of the material musing of a young dad...that I said F*#k it and bid on the damn thing anyway.I won  will use it as a range bag at the Skeet and Trap Club.

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